Greetings Sexy Bitches and Beasts!
For Week One, we road the first two chapters: "The Dating Trenches" and "The Romantic Comedy That Predicted My Future".
Here are this week's discussion questions. Answer all, some, or none! But please do indicate which question you are answering by the number posted.
1. Gottlieb refers to "Deal Breakers" in a dating scenario. What's "deal breakers" have you had in your past, and are they still the same today as they were, say, ten years ago?
2. Similarly, what shortcomings have made you overlook a man in the past, and do you still fell the same way? Should we have shortcomings at all, or should we embrace Gottlieb's advice toward a more spirited, open-minded dating approach?
3. Do you agree that how women view dating at 20 is far different than how we view dating at 40? And how so?
I'll post my replies in the comment section tomorrow, but please feel free to get the conversation rolling! If you are following up with someone's comment or question, please be sure to refer to them specifically so we know who you are responding to.
For next Tuesday (2/23), please read the next four chapters:
* How Feminism Fucks Up My Love Life
* Speed Dating Disaster
*Older, and Wanting to Be Wiser
* $3500 for Love (through page 106).
Thanks!
LuckyBroad
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1. Former Deal Breakers:
ReplyDeleteYounger
Shorter
Too lean
Too religious (or too atheist)
Not well traveled (or well read… I can except one but not both)
Too well off (I grew up in a single mom household… I need to relate)
I don’t think I could deal with younger even now, but the rest I could probably get over. I am dating right now, and he is fairly atheist and grew up in a relatively comfortable family life but he’s been through things that make me know he can relate to me on a different level. I’m not yet 30 but I think 10 years ago, I wouldn’t have been looking for a man as ‘husband/father material’ like I did when I started dating my current boyfriend.
2. I still feel that I walked away from a great guy when I turned down someone when I was 19. I didn’t have the spark. He was tall, athletic, handsome, and funny; he had been through some tough times. He was perfect, but I didn’t feel the spark.
There are a few shortcomings that are new deal breakers. I need someone who’s motivated enough in life to do what it takes to pay the bills, and manage to balance out their hobbies and interests. I don’t want someone who won’t take ‘just any job’. I don’t have time for those people in my life let alone a potential life mate.
1. I tried to rack my brain to think up "deal breakers" and I really came up with very few. I'm great at not knowing WHAT I don't want until I encounter it. There aren't any major physical attributes that I would consider "deal breakers", and when I was younger, I had that "the world is my oyster" approach and figured love would carry me through any obstacles.
ReplyDelete3. Since I haven't been much for deal-breakers when I was younger, I can very much learn from my mistake! Like you, Maritime, I am far more interested in someone who knows what they want at this stage in life, and not as interested in a free-wheeling financial journey. Similarly, I very much crave security; I don't think I had any concept of the important of this at 20, but I sure do now at 34.
So yes, I very much agree that your views on dating change with time, although how much so depends on where you are starting out from!